Cubao
by Stella Kalaw
I saw my grandparents once since migrating to America from the Philippines. It was right after I graduated from school in California. My heart ached as I sat next to Lola (grandmother). I held her hand. She had been suffering from Alzheimer's disease and diabetes for years. Before I left, she was still vibrant and it was difficult to see her in this condition. Then Lolo (grandfather) came out from the dining room. I stood up and greeted him with a mano (I took his hand and pressed it to my forehead). I don't know if he recognized me but I asked how he was doing. All he could mutter was "Ha?" He was hard of hearing. My Lola died in 2002 and my Lolo passed away a week before I took these photographs. Even when I was a child, I hardly knew them in spite of celebrating many birthdays, holidays, and vacations together. My memories are few but visiting Cubao resurfaced many that I had forgotten.
Lola’s Kitchen I and II
Our family get-togethers were always centered around food. Lunches at the Cubaos every other weekend were a large part of my memories with my grandparents. The kitchen was Lola’s territory and she would guide Iling with the menu and preparing the dishes.
2. The Piano
As a child, my mom would imagine herself playing the piano, running her fingers on a piece of paper with drawn keys. Observing this, my Lola wanted to buy her a piano so she could learn. However, after the war, affording a new instrument was difficult, so she purchased a second-hand one. When I developed an interest in playing the piano, the keys had faded and worn out, but it still produced a beautiful sound. Lola made sure to have it tuned regularly. It was my Lolo who taught me my first pieces, "Chopsticks" and "In the Mood".
3. Iling and Basyon
Iling had been my grandmother's housekeeper for 35 years. During my visit, she shared, "I promised your Lola that I would stay with her until her last breath." And she fulfilled her promise. I recall Iling always smoking a dark brown cigarette, burning on both ends. Curious, I asked her about it. She explained, "As a child, I had a toothache, and my mother taught me to smoke to alleviate the pain. So, I continued it out of habit.”
4. Santo Niño and Stereo
Portraits through still lives. Remnants from the past– an old stereo from the 1960s and a statue of a Santo Nino. Also in the photograph is a dried banana leaf from a past Palm Sunday celebration, a statue of San Lorenzo Ruiz, Mother Mary, and the Holy Family.
5. Tita’s Dresser
I have vivid memories of Tita's room. The windows were covered, and the air conditioner ran constantly. She had been unwell for an extended period. During our visits, I would often peek inside her room to greet her. Sometimes, she wouldn't come out at all. On those occasions, it felt peculiar to be in Lola's house without hearing her lively laughter.
6. Lolo and Lola’s Picture on the Wall
My grandparents adored dancing. While browsing old photographs, I noticed several snapshots like this one displayed on the wall. Live music held a special place in my Lolo's heart. When we reached a certain age, he would bring us to The Manila Hotel to listen to The Posadas band. He was such a regular attendee that they would always play his beloved song, "New York, New York," whenever he was present. Sometimes, he would come up the stage and they would let him play the maracas.
7. Dining Table
My aunties fondly recount how I insisted on having Kare-kare, my favorite dish, every time we visited. I wouldn't eat anything else. So, my grandmother always prepared it for me. I don’t recall her joining us at the dining table. Instead, she stood behind a chair smiling while she watched us savor her cooking. Lolo brought pastillas from Pangasinan where he taught Engineering classes during the weekdays. I have vivid memories of devouring an entire box all to myself.
Stella Kalaw
Bio
Stella Kalaw was born and raised in Manila, Philippines. She earned a BA in Communication Arts at De La Salle University, Manila, and a BA in Professional Photography at Brooks Institute in Santa Barbara, CA. Her photographs explore narratives rooted in memories and places. Her fine art work has been exhibited at the Singapore International Photography Festival, The Ayala Museum in Manila, Wall Space Gallery in Seattle, Kala Art Gallery in Berkeley, and the Rayko Gallery in San Francisco. Her portrait and editorial works have been featured in the New York Times, Gastronomica Magazine, Wine Enthusiast Magazine, and Fortune Small Business Magazine. She is based in Emeryville, CA.